New Year Resolutions
New Year’s Resolutions. We love to make them, we love to get excited, we love that initial rush of motivation, and we love talking about them. But how much effort do we typically put into making them a reality?
New Year’s Resolutions tend to be:
· Joining a gym
· Starting a new diet
· Losing weight
· Cutting back on alcohol
· Taking up a sport or new hobby
New Year’s Resolutions potentially date back to the 17th century, when people would make promises to the God’s in hope of good fortune in the New Year. Since then, resolutions have evolved to be more about personal growth, and we do them as a way to encourage ourselves to make positive changes in the year that follows. But this is just the fourth step in the lengthy transitional phase that’s needed to facilitate realistic long-term change.
Wanting to change isn’t enough
It takes planning, truly accepting your situation and yourself for what they are in this moment, and making small and sustainable progress.
Generally, the stages go something like this:
1. Acknowledge you are unhappy about something
2. Work out what you are unhappy about and why. What are the consequences of continuing?
3. Work out why you do it in the first place (this could be painful for some)
4. Think about what your resolutions should be carefully and write them down
5. Think about potential roadblocks. What in your daily life could steer you off track?
6. Plan for those roadblocks. Pre-empt and plan the actions to take when obstacles appear
7. Get that support. Share your plans with friends and family so they know not to tempt you, and in moments of weakness may actually help you stay on track
8. Start the New Year prepared and motivated, plans in hand, memberships paid
9. Keep reminders of your goals, consequences, and reasons for making the change. It can be easy to forget our intentions when faced with something tempting you back to old habits
Usually, we are not geared to do a deep analysis on our habits and motivations. Because of this, we’ll do step 1, jump to step 4, and stagger over to step 8. In doing this we miss important opportunities for self-actualisation, personal growth, and acceptance. This is why people who have never had a gym membership decide to join a gym and inevitably stop going after a month or two, and people who start a healthier diet go back to their old ways of eating within days.
Let’s look at a very basic case study.
Georgia is 34 years old, living with her significant other, and their two children who are five and three years old. Georgia works four hours a day Monday to Friday, to fit around her children’s routine. She tends to eat whatever the children eat, and if she is busy during their meal time, will eat something premade that tends to be high in salt and fat just before going to bed. At work, her colleagues and some customers will bring in baked goods and she will rarely turn them down. Her house also has snacks for the kids like crisps and chocolate that she will occasionally help herself to, as will her partner.
Because of her schedule she tends to not drink much water, is deficient in some important nutrients, is gaining weight, tends to not have the best energy levels, feels sad often, her skin is very dry and suffers regular break outs, she looks older than her years, and is often bloated and uncomfortable. Enough is enough, and it’s now Christmas evening and Georgia has gorged on food all day. She feels bloated, sluggish, and regretful, and these feelings prompt her to decide that in the New Year she will have a healthier diet, lose some weight, drink more water, and just try to generally get her health on track. However, she continues to eat whatever she fancies until the stroke of midnight on December 31st, when she has a glass of water to bring in the New Year, and goes to bed.
So, it’s now January 1st and Georgia is excited to eat more nutrient dense foods and consume more water. The following morning, she heads to her local supermarket with the best intentions with her two children in tow. In the store, she loads her trolley with fresh fruits and vegetables, lean meats, low mercury seafoods, and other high fibre goods. She’s off to a brilliant start. Her children soon start asking for snacks so she goes to the aisles with biscuits and crisps and she purchases multipacks.
On her return home gets to making herself a healthy but late breakfast, and during the first day she maintains her healthy diet with grains, small amounts of dairy, low fat sources of protein, and fruits and vegetables only. She is not phased by the cupboards that are spilling over with unhealthy treats. Through day two and three she is able to keep her new healthy lifestyle up. On day four she is back to work. She has prepared her lunch which she tends to eat at her desk, but decides not to bring in any snacks as her working day is short and she can eat when she gets home. Her colleagues question why she’s not eating any of the muffins a client has left, and she simply replies with “I just don’t feel like it today”.
It is now day 12, and she has returned to snacking on grazing on unhealthy snacks at work and home, but is still eating salads and fruits, and she has added two glasses of water to each day. She is still experiencing her bloating, but maybe somewhat less, she has only lost half a pound in weight, and is still struggling with her energy levels and poor skin. Over the next 30 days she sees no real difference, and bounces between eating really well, to falling into her old habits.
What went wrong?
Thinking, planning, and sharing. Georgia didn’t think about her diet possibly contributing to her low mood and energy levels, or that her low mood may affect her diet which is a trap a lot of us can fall into: focusing solely on weight. This in itself misdirected her motivations and could have aided her downfall. She also didn’t consider how having certain snacks in the house may eventually be too appealing once our bodies hit that pivotal moment after a few days where it’s so easy to be lured back, or that she could be stressed and in fact be an emotional eater, meaning other lifestyle changes are needed first. Nor, did she consider taking healthy snacks to work knowing full well that there will be a lot of temptation there or confide in her colleagues who could have provided extra support. Georgia completed step 1, dipped a toe into 2, ran to 4, and skipped straight to 8.
What may have helped Georgia?
We tend to fail our resolutions because we don’t look at the things in our lives that will trip us up, or look at the reasons why we do what we do. Georgia failed to realise that her working environment is a big obstacle, as well as her schedule and home life. Rather than eating poorly up until January 1st, thinking, planning, and easing herself in by making very small changes ahead of the New Year we would have made the transition far easier, and planning for the big change based on those moments you’re likely to indulge are super important. I mean, if your goal is to cut down on drinking, but already drink multiple nights a week, keep a full wine rack or a fridge full of beer at home, and the only place you ever meet your friends is in the pub; there are going to be some problems.
Hopefully as you’re reading this you will have thought of some New Year’s Resolutions of your own. For your next steps you’ll think, plan, and confide in your nearest and dearest for extra support. You visualise starting that change, and how great you’ll feel when you make it. Maybe you envision your friends commenting on how much healthier you look or how happier you seem. You start, and it feels really good.
Now comes the hard part: you’re a few days in, your motivation is starting to wane, and your cravings and temptations to fall back into familiar habits grows stronger. This is stage 8, and perhaps the most important stage because it makes way for permanent change. Motivation can be fleeting, and feel euphoric at times, but it takes work to maintain it, and remain committed to it as it changes and we organically wander in and out of it.
Please also see my article on discovering and keeping your motivation for extra help on making the most of your New Year promises: https://www.ocare.co.uk/journal/discover-your-motivation
Some easier to maintain New Year resolution ideas for anyone with health goals:
- I’m going to walk more in the New Year
- I will eat one cruciferous vegetable per day
- I will consume one more glass of water per day
- I will seek counselling to work on my unhealthy relationship with food/my body/alcohol etc.
- I will look for local and safe places to go walking regularly
- I will make a conscious effort find alternative places to meet friends other than the place my temptations kick in
- I will plan my meals ahead of time